Writing has always been a part of my life eversince. But I cant say I'm the best writer, I'm in the making of becoming a better writer. To me I think my writing developed once I reached high school. In the begining of freshman year I gotta say my writing wasn't all that great and needed improvments. The way I did certain writing assignment were plain and boring. But as the year went by I learned a alot of things that will assist me in becoming a better writer. Most of the writings that we did in class were personnel connections,whether they were arguments or the way we viewed the topic from our point of view. Mrs.Seuoka gave me a better understanding on producing a good quality writing piece, inlcuding the six traits that should apply to the writing. With critique crtisism after every writing assignments, it encourages me to do better the next time.
My writing goals is to gather and organize all my thoughts so my writing flows, and apply more of the six traits in my writing, and to expand my vocabulary.
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Hi Raena,
ReplyDeleteGreat goals for your writing this year. I'm glad that the 6 traits have helped you to improve as a writer, both in skill and in confidence :)
In your pro-con impromptu, you have a definite stand on the banning of iPods. You also bring in examples from your personal experience.
What is needed, though are more varied and specific arguments and support. Right now, some of the ideas are repeated within the essay. This may be because you only talk about iPods. Since both articles go beyond just iPods and actually address all of technology, it would strengthen your paper to use examples from those tools, as well.
In the area of mechanics, we'll need to work on sentence fragments. For example, the first two sentences in your third paragraph are fragments. If you read them out loud, I think you'll see that they seem like they should be conected to something else. That's because they are what we call dependent clauses. They need a complete sentence to "stick to" so that they'll make sense :)
mrs s